Taking its lead from the United States Government, Google has withdrawn support for smartphones made by Chinese telecom giant Huawei. “Citizens of the United States will not stand for their personal private information being illegally…
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A forceful tweet by President Trump has saved the United States from certain domination by the Islamic Republic of Iran, which would have seen all aspects of American life controlled by the Supreme Leader Ali…
Saying it was no longer a viable state, the United States had decided to abort the State of Alabama in order to preserve its mother nation’s health and well being. “It would have had a…
Echoing President Trump’s complaints that wages are too high, his supporters today insisted the $7.25 per hour they are receiving for the limited periods they are given work was far too high. “Somewhere somebody is…
As he intensified his trade war with China, President Trump today pledged to use his Federal authority to buy up certain products that he believes may be affected. “I will not allow our great fast…
Speaking to the graduating class at Liberty University, Vice-President Mike Pence had some words of warning for the upstanding good Christian men in the crowd. “Be prepared to be ridiculed for calling your wives and…
President Trump has responded quickly to criticism of his jocular reaction to a supporter who suggested shooting immigrants at a Florida rally. “My response was entirely inappropriate given the thought and consideration this wonderful American…
Amazon CEO Jeff Bezos has entered the space business with the announcement of his Blue Moon lunar lander designed to deliver payloads to the moon’s surface. Though Bezos maintained his lunar lander was in response…
After a tough grilling by Senators and a subsequent failure to appear before a House committee, Attorney General Bill Barr said today he would not be able to answer any more questions until he had…
Fast food purveyor Kentucky Fried Chicken has wasted no time taking advantage of the publicity generated by Democrat Steve Cohen of Tennessee when he brought a bucket of KFC to a House Committee hearing Attorney…
With Joe Biden now in the race for the Democratic nomination and Bernie Sanders already in a strong position based on his showing last time, both camps met today to discuss what they would do…
An exclamation point at the end of one of President Trump’s tweets expressed confusion today after realizing it was at the end of a tweet about recent events in Sri Lanka. “I must be a…
Authorities are preparing for the possible release of the entire federal prison population based on a legal challenge filed today. The case, Everyone Convicted Of A Crime v. Attorney General Bill Barr, argues that based…
There was some welcome news out of Paris today, with word that Notre Dame’s bee population survived the terrible fire there. “We’re fine, and we expect a hive upgrade.” Feeling this was their big chance…
White House Press Secretary Sarah Sanders expressed her puzzlement today over widespread anger about her comments that FBI agents disliked former director James Comey. The uproar began when the Mueller Report revealed that they had…
With time his hands now that the Mueller Report has been released, Attorney General Bill Barr today signed a contract to be the next spokesperson for I Can’t Believe It’s Not Butter! “It’s always been…
Bernie Sanders today tried to explain why he is suddenly a millionaire to his many youthful supporters, many of whom he blames for the development. “Everything I own seems to have miraculously increased in value!”…
The research and development division at the company that makes Doritos is buzzing after one of their resident food scientists had what is being described at the ‘mother of all Eureka moments’ during a discussion…
Senate Majority leader Mitch McConnell has announced his re-election campaign, which he says will start in earnest after a short vacation at the beach for his annual mating ritual. “Though the mating season runs from…
A delegation of penguins has officially requested that Pittsburgh’s NHL team change its name following a playoff loss in straight games to the New York Islanders. “You’ve been the penguins for so long. Maybe it’s…