The online reaction over the death by shooting of Harambe the gorilla at a Cincinnati zoo has been quick to condemn all those responsible, starting with the four year old who entered the enclosure without…
The Penguins are in the Stanley Cup finals, which can only mean one thing for Pittsburgh – the opportunity to abuse Marc-André Fleury at the highest level. Fans know they have plenty of room for…
An interview with Donald Trump has resurfaced in which he says women getting pregnant is ‘inconvenient’ for business. Whatever the context of that remark, business leaders are excited to have a nominee and possibly a…
The archeological world has been rocked by the discovery of mysterious structures in a cave in France believed to have been built by Neanderthals over 170,000 years ago. The exciting find suggests the extinct species…
[Kashiko Island, Japan] Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau is making headlines at his first G7 Summit for physically manhandling the leaders of France and the United Kingdom. The incident occurred when the world leaders broke…
[Pittsburgh, PA] If you happen to see cars driving around by themselves these days, don’t be alarmed as Uber has selected Pittsburgh as a test city for its new generation of self driving vehicles. An…
[Smyrna, TN] Following safety recalls issued by Subaru earlier in the year, carmaker Nissan (NYANY) has issued a recall for all of its models with productions years 1995 through 2016, as they are dangerously uncool….
[The White House] Invoking the optimistic spirit of another young President, Barack Obama today directed NASA to embark on an historic mission to land a man on the moon, and leave him there. “It is…
Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau has made quite an impression in the time that has elapsed since his shock victory, due no doubt to his wise political philosophy of always looking like Matthew McConaughey’s less…
‘Duck Dynasty’ Patriarch Phil Robertson has delved into the transgender bathroom issue with what he calls a ‘radical idea’ that men should use the men’s restroom and women should use the womens’s restroom. Notwithstanding the…
Paul Ryan has resisted calls to immediately endorse presumptive GOP nominee Donald Trump, saying he needs time to get to know the famously shy demagogue. “We had 17 candidates during the primary, so you can’t…
In the latest fallout from the Sandusky scandal, a former Penn State assistant coach has come to re-evaluate whether he was ever really a part of Joe Paterno’s formidable football program after all. “I kind…
Former US Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia, who died suddenly while still on the bench, is remembered for his dominant personality, intellectual prowess, and the Originalist Theory that was his guiding judicial philosophy. Though he…
Arabic numerals, also known colloquially as ‘numbers’, have been banned by the Department of Homeland Security after it emerged they are actually terrorist codes being used by ISIS to destroy the American way of life….
Just days after effectively securing the Republican nonimation by appealing to the worst instincts of its base, Donald Trump has defied the consensus that he cannot prevail in the general election. Polls showed he had…
It is with great regret that we announce the death of the Republican Party, which passed away last night after a long illness. The legendary party of Lincoln, also known affectionately as the GOP, was…
Lee Harvey Oswald has proven the latest victim of a brutal GOP primary race after frontrunner and almost certain nominee Donald Trump made a connection between him and wildly unpopular fellow candidate Ted Cruz earlier…
The band Radiohead, who are well known for pulling off unusual stunts, have effectively disappeared, with their entire social media presence gone overnight. It is believed Thom Yorke may well have got the idea from…
The valuation of crypto-currency Bitcoin fell sharply today relative to traditional state-backed currencies after it emerged that the mysterious bitcoin creator known only as Satoshi Nakamoto was actually an Australian entrepreneur named Craig Wright. Speculators…
A comprehensive survey of woman has revealed an astonishing degree of concurrence with Kirk Cameron’s controversial views on marriage. When asked whether they would be prepared to ‘submit’ to Cameron if he was their husband,…
