UK Prime Minister Theresa May expressed gratitude to the United States today after being told she would receive assistance with the ongoing KFC crisis across the pond. What began as a shortage of chicken in…
Area psychopath Matthew Daniels said today he is ‘beyond furious’ with Dicks and Walmart for raising the age to buy firearms to 21 years old. “This is such bullshit.” The mentally-deranged violent young man, who…
President Trump has announced he is relocating to a smaller White House more suited to his needs following the latest departure from his administration. “It’s time to live somewhere easier to manage now the nest…
Jared Kushner has learned he has been downgraded from a member of the DD Perk’s Club to a regular Dunkin’ Donuts customer. A spokesperson for the coffee chain said the action was entirely appropriate. “He…
