The 2019 Oscars finally has a host, after one was selected by randomly calling people listed in the phone book until one of them agreed to do it.
“We are pleased to announce that William Smedley III of Munster, Indiana, will be this year’s host.”
Smedley, who at 98 sometimes has difficulty determining what year it is, said he’s looking forward to hosting the Oscars and getting to meet some of his favorite movie stars.
“That Ava Gardner sure is a firecracker!”
The Academy addressed the matter of his age head on, saying that it should come as no surprise really.
“That was kind of inevitable given that it was going to be someone with a landline.”
The first-time host said he was looking forward to making a few jokes, and may even try to push the envelope as he heard that’s what people do in this role.
“I might just say “hell” during my monologue, but only if I’m feeling adventurous.”