The small African nation state of Nambia is sadly no more. President Trump said he received intelligence of a massive terrorist attack that utterly overwhelmed the plucky pacifist nation, which never stood a chance.
“It is with a heavy heart that I have to report that terrorists have wiped Nambia from the map. Such good people. They will be missed!”
Trump described the devastation as total, which he attributed to their open border and generous welfare policies.
“They were so welcoming to everyone and it led to their demise. Sad!”
What little information he has is that the co-ordinated attack occurred after a huge infiltration of the country by radicals.
“If only they had built a wall and imposed a comprehensive travel ban, they would still be with us.”
So cruel and hateful were the terror groups who attacked Nambia, that they removed all trace of it. Those on the ground said it was as if the Nambians had never existed at all.
“That is why I ask all Americans to join me in honoring the lost nation of Nambia by not making the same mistakes they did.”