Amy Coney Barrett Pauses Nomination Ceremony To Get Instructions From People Of Praise Handlers

(The White House) There were mild scenes of awkwardness at the nomination ceremony of Amy Coney Barrett on Saturday when she paused proceedings to take a very important phone call.

“Sorry but I have to take this – it’s my boss”

Those in attendance, including President Trump himself, we left waiting patiently in the Rose Garden while Barrett nodded and muttered “Uh-huh, got it” during the lengthy call. Barrett apologize profusely for the 20 minute delay during which she was given detailed instructions on how to behave as Handmaid #3 on the bench.

“I wouldn’t have taken it if it wasn’t directly related to my future work on the nation’s highest court.”

Barrett then thanked the President for selecting her.

“The Kingdom of God is forever grateful for the continued blessings you bestow upon it.”

YOUR GENEROSITY KEEPS THE SATIRE COMING!

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