Vice President Mike Pence has sworn in the first official member of the Space Force during a ceremony in the Executive Office Building. General John Raymond is now Chief of Space Operations of the newest branch of the US military brought into being by President Trump.
However people have already noted something strange about the Space Force’s first official member, leading to concerns that its alien adversaries have already succeeded in infiltrating it.
“There’s something about the large gray head and giant black bug eyes that makes me uneasy.”
Others reported what they described as a ‘tentacle whipping around’ at various points during the swearing-in ceremony.
“It’s almost like General Raymond is trying to conceal something.”
Vice President Pence dismissed the fears as ridiculous, but that has only caused the lens of suspicion to focus on him.
“Mike Pence seems confused about human sexuality and gets basic things wrong like calling your wife your mother. Hmmmmm.”
They also noted his stiff and plastic-like appearance.
“It seems being controlled by Russia may be the least of our problems.”