Beto O’Rourke’s surprise announcement that he is dropping out of the Democratic Primary has led to dissappointment in a lot of quarters, and none more so than the White House where President Trump is said…
The headquarters for the 2020 Presidential Campaign of Maryland politican Jon Delaney delcared victory in the race for the White House tonoght after learning that Beto O’ Rourke had abandoned his bid earlier in the…
President Trump expressed his pleasure today at what he described as a tidal wave of support for his agenda ahead of the 2020 elections. “Even my former AG Jeff Sessions said he’s never seen so…
(The White House) President Trump privately expressed some regret today for his inflammatory ‘lynching’ comment about being impeached, though it’s thought to be motivated by fears that a particular individual will take him to task….
(The Kremlin) Responding to accusations that they are assisting Tulsi Gabbard’s candidacy in the 2020 Presidential race, Russian authorities today denied providing any aid. “We are sticking with our proven strategy of promoting Donald Trump,…
Called to appear before the House to explain what he knows regarding the Ukraine call at the center of the impeachment inquiry, DOE chief Rick Perry today pleaded ignorance. “I want this committee to understand…
Triplying down on his asserted right to encourage foreign governments to hobble his political opponents, President Trump today announced he has set-up a free hotline for overseas leaders to undermine Joe Biden anyway they can….
(The White House) President Trump has again demanded the right to confront the whistleblower who leaked damning details of a call made to the leader of Ukraine pressuring that foreign power to investigate Democrats during…
(Acre, Brazil) As more and more countries reveal that President Trump pressured them to intervene in domestic US politics to his advantage, there was major anthropological news today as an isolated tribe – hitherto believed…
(The Kremlin) Russian President Vladimir Putin is said to be fuming today after being briefed on President Trump’s phonecall with his Ukrainian counterpart. “This is an outrage!” Putin left no-one in any doubt that he…
As she faces her sentance for her part in the college admissions scandal, actor Felicity Huffman expressed regret today that she did not take a more law-abiding approach to ensuring her child succeeded academically. “If…
The race for the Democratic nonimation for President was completely upended today, with the release of new polls with a hitherto unknown contender topping all of them. “It’s Green Shirt Guy all the way!” Though…
Insisting that he did not make a mistake during the last Democrat debate, former VP Joe Biden (now Joe 30330) explained that he recently changed his surname. “Joe 30330 doesn’t make mistakes. He’s cool. He’s…
The candidacy of Elizabeth Warren is up in the air tonight after authorities arrested and charged the Massachusetts Senator with the savage murder of one John Delaney. “It was horrific.” Authorities are confident they can…
As they enter the second round of primary debates, the Democratic Party has demonstrated its ability to be firm and decisive and ready to assume power from Donald J Trump. “Tonight we have the second…
President Trump is conyinuing his attack on ‘The Squad”, including saying in a recent stump speech that they are the reason shampoo bottles have instructions. Though it went down well, the quip has started a…
President Trump has dismissed potential primary challanger Mark Sanford, saying the Republican and evangelical base will never accept him. “Mark Sanford cheated on his wife – wrong!” Trump also pointed out that Sanford lied repeatedly…
In the latest twist and turn of an exciting start to the election season, Joe Biden topped the political headlines today when his foot briefly made an appearance outside of its normal resting place in…
(Paris, France) Following her team’s victory over France in the World Cup Quarter-Finals, US Soccer Captain Megan Rapinoe has made a surprise announcement regarding her feud with President Trump. “Fuck it – instead of complaining…
Of all the candidates at the second Democratic debate, the one that is the talk of water coolers is surely Marianne Williamson, whose bizzare statements had everyone doing a ‘say what?’ throughout the evening. This…
