Specific to Pittsburgh this weekend, the Pennsylvania Department of Agriculture today updated its advice about invasive species plaguing the area. “There is a new invasive species everyone needs to be aware of in addition to…
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All across the country today angry rants accompanied by wild gesticulating and the throwing of nearby furniture will mark the sad passing of Jerry Springer, who has died aged 79. In between tributes of pantomime…
The entertainment company Hulu today confirmed the long-awaited debut of Season Five of its hugely popular drama The Handmaid’s Tale, which will be available for binge viewing in the coming months. Unusually for the series,…
(Orlando, FL) The Disney corporation has responded to pressure by governor Ron DeSantis to fall in line with his puritanical view of sexuality by defiantly announcing it will do no such thing. In order to…
(NATO HQ) Representatives of the North Atlantic Treaty Organization apologized today after a huge mix-up in the delivery of advanced weaponry intended for the defense of Ukraine in the face of the ongoing Russian invasion…
Rap artist and occasional Presidential candidate Kanye West – who currently goes by ‘Ye’ – has demanded that the streaming service Spotify delete songs other than his own or he’s leaving. West had a ready…
(Punxsatawney, PA) The annual tradition of Groundhog Day has been thrown into chaos on the event of the event after famed rodent meteorologist Punxsutawney Phil said he will not say whether he sees his shadow or…
As part of its acquisition of the hugely popular word game, WORDLE, the New York Times has announced it will be releasing a two-letter version of the game so that Trump supporters can enjoy it…
The solitary Spotify subscriber who listens to both Joe Rogan’s podcast and Neil Young’s music said today he is torn over what to do after the Canadian singer said the streaming service had to choose…
(Pittsburgh, PA) After the successful introduction of its oversized powered recliner seating with folding food trays, Cinemark has announced the next level of comfort cinema viewing will be available at its Settler’s Ridge location from…
Sesame Street was thrown into chaos today on news that one of its well-known residents, Cookie Monster, is not vaccinated against COVID despite leading everyone to believe that he was. With vaccination rates believed to…
Amazon stock (NASDAQ:AMZN) hit new heights today, closing at $3,859.21 on news of the latest innovation in the e-commerce company’s relentless drive to ever-increasing efficiency. Following a successful pilot scheme, it plans to install Squid-Game-style…
Williams Shatner today expressed his enormous disappointment with his recent trip to space aboard the Blue Origin, with the Star Trek actor saying it was a huge let down in numerous ways. “It just went…
Fans of 80s and 90s Mancunian music are ecstatic today after news leaked that both The Smiths and Oasis are reforming jointly to create the guitar-based superband ‘The Smasis’. Though talks of either band reforming…
The child’s toy formally known as Mr Potato Head criticized owner Hasbro today for using his name as part of their latest virtue signaling initiative. While he agrees taking steps to reduce gender bias is…
Though he normally loathes to comment on work activities, the Grim Reaper admitted today to a local radio station that scything Rush Limbaugh recently was ‘pretty sweet’ compared to how the job usually goes. “When…
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The United States – long thought to be a nation divided along multiple fault-lines – is now completely unified with all its peoples dedicated to a common cause to bringing about a better life for…
Kurt Russell awake to frantic messages today pleading with him to overthrow the commandeering of Air Force One by a known terrorist. The individual in question is said to be ‘many more magnitudes more dangerous’…
(The White House) It has emerged that President Trump intends to grant a ‘full and unequivocal pardon’ to film director Tom Hooper for his role in making the movie CATS, based on the musical of…
