President Trump has indicated he considered nominating his daughter, Ivanka, to lead the World Bank because she is ‘very good with numbers’. However Ivanka’s appointment to head the World Bank was complicated by late emergence…
Read More
The recent dispute between AOC and Ted Cruz – where she tweeted how outrageous it was that the minimum wage is the cost of an airport croissant and he attempted to criticize her by implying…
Joel Osteen is said to be in shock today after being hit with a Cease And Desist order by the Lord Our Saviour, which prevents him from collecting money from the public in the name…
The Boeing company has announced a brand new aircraft that it hopes will reassure the public that it is dedicated to safety following the crash of two of its 737 Max 8 planes introduced in…
Fire Departments across the country are dealing with an epidemic of house fires, particularly in New York City and California. The puzzling outbreak was finally explained today when investigators discovered it was Democrats burning their…
Saying he’d finally ‘cracked the puzzle’ of how to make a profitable electric car, Elon Musk has announced a total overhaul of the Tesla Model 3, which has been cut in price from $42,000 to…
Ivanka Trump has fought back against critics who say she doesn’t know what hard work is, and that she is in no position to take about what average Americans need. “I worked my dad very…
In the highly competitive category of best performance by a product placed in a feature film, Omega Watch was the winner tonight for its highly lauded role in the film Vice. “I’ve never seen a…
Freshly dead fashion designer Karl Lagerfeld has reportedly wasted no time in telling God that his design sense is ‘atrocious’ and the decor in Heaven would ‘make me kill myself if I wasn’t already dead’….
New Yorkers with Amazon Prime found themselves unable stream their favorite videos today, after an unfortunate glitch slowed down content delivery to IP addresses in the city. None other than the Amazon CEO Jeff Bezos…
After having what he describes as a ‘that-guy-in-the-bathtub’ moment, President Trump is said to have solved the problem of how to get his border wall built once and for all. “The answer was staring me…
The Academy of Motion Picture Arts & Sciences has backed down on its plan to replace winner’s speeches with advertising breaks in the categories of cinematography, editing, makeup & hairstyling and live-action short following a…
(Pittsburgh, PA) The owner of a local major print newspaper is being hailed as nothing short of a genius by employees and the readership after coming up with an inventive way to scoop all other…
Saying he would never allow himself to be in a position where he could be blackmailed, Jeff Bezos has released hundreds of naked photos of himself to be displayed all over the Amazon.com website. “There…
President Trump has announced that current acting Secretary for the Interior, David Bernhardt, will be formally nominated to the position. Bernhardt, a former lobbyist for the oil industry, said the preservation of threatened species would…
Internet celebrity Grumpy Cat has revealed in an interview with Hello Magazine that her efforts to improve her mood have resulted in her earning ability disappearing almost overnight. “No-one returns my calls anymore. No-one.” Though…
Saying times were rough financially and that he needed to parlay his experience in government into something lucrative, former Trump Press Secretary Sean Spicer today announced the formation of Spicer Lying Consultants. “We will be…
Dirty greenhouse-gas-belching coal pants across the United States apologized today for failing to avert the present cold snap by raising global temperatures drastically. “Unfortunately, mother nature got one by us, but it won’t happen again…
Former Starbucks CEO Howard Schultz has signaled his intention to run for the White House in 2020. What was initially thought to be a divisive, threadbare candidacy that would only help Trump was transformed today…
(The White House) President Trump took time out from his busy schedule today to conduct some personal business involving the new charity he founded to replace the Trump Foundation that was shut down by the…