As he seeks to position himself for his own run at the Oval Office, former Vice President Mike Pence has confided to aides that initial efforts to carve out a support base from the religious…
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(Dallas, TX) Conservatives gathered in Texas for CPAC 2021 were exposed to an exhibit of extreme moronicity this weekend, though most appeared not to recognize the significance of the occasion they were witness too. The moron…
In what is being described as one of the largest incidences of mass cognitive dissonance in history, millions of people in the United States are celebrating the founding of that democratic nation this 4th of…
(Mar-a-Lago, FL) Former President Donald Trump has responded forcefully to news that indictments have been handed down against the Trump Organization and its senior officers. Speaking to reporters, Trump unequivocally denied any connection to the…
(Fort Meade, MD) Reacting to accusations by FOX News host Tucker Carlson that they are spying on him, officials at the National Security Agency (NSA) today admitted that he is indeed one of their surveillance…
After responding to criticisms that it has funded law-makers who played down the significance of the Capitol Riot in January, the Toyota Motor Corporation (NYSE:TM) has doubled-down on its position with the release of a…
(Mar-a-Lago) Denouncing the Biden administration for doing a ‘terrible job’ combatting the COVID pandemic in light of new highly transmissible variants emerging, former President Donald Trump today announced a improved version of his recommended method…
(Wellington, OH) A largely successful rally held by President Trump as part of his comeback was slightly marred by a poor choice of venue that left attendees with little opportunity for treasonous activity afterwards. “He…
Former Presidential lawyer Rudy Giuliani has immediately refuted the validity of a ruling suspending his license to practice law in New York on the basis that the issuing court has no legitimacy as a result…
Proving the Trumpers were right all along, a massive plot by ANTIFA to disrupt an orderly conservative society was uncovered today in a development sure to throw new light on the nebulous organization some say…
Ousted Israeli leader Benjamin Netanyahu spoke with former President Trump at his Mar-a-Lago residence today with a special favor to ask. “I would be most obliged if you would lend me your Capitol Riot mob,…
Speaking to fellow Democrats today, Senator Joe Manchin said he was opposed to any further measures to vaccinate Americans against COVID until a proper broad consensus has been reached. “I do not believe the current…
Following rampant speculation on social media, former President Trump admitted today that he indeed was wearing his signature blue trousers back-to-front recently, though he declined to admit to any mistake. Instead he insisted that he…
FOX News presenter Tucker Carlson has been advised to take a break from the airwaves, after a recent run of high-profile episodes overtaxed his brain cell. “Most people have 100 billion brain cells to help…
Senior GOP members demanded today that Democrats join them in creating a bipartisan Congressional commission to investigate alleged chewing on a White House sofa by President Biden’s dogs, Champ and Major. “This blatant assault in…
Speaking on the Joe Rogan podcast, a loaf of Wonder Bread has insisted it won’t apologize for its lack of color despite what it claims is relentless pressure from the left to do so. Critics…
(Pittsburgh, PA) In a major upset, the Democratic primary election for mayor of Pittsburgh has been won by Ed Gainey, who defeated the incumbent, Bill Peduto. With no Republican having won since 1934 it effectively…
Just days after he signed a law limiting abortion to the first six weeks of pregnancy, a new proposal to abort Texas Governor Greg Abbott is garnering huge support nationwide. “We definitely need exceptions to…
In great news for the fight against COVID, the United States has now reached full herd immunity after previously struggling to get a sizable vocal minority vaccinated. The move came after Dr. Fauci made an…
The Sergeant at Arms for the US Capitol has issued a warning to members of Congress and their staff about a big turd that may try to force itself through their letterboxes. The advisory came…
