(Bordeaux, France) Owners of France’s most famous vineyards are meeting tonight to decide what action they can take if any to mitigate the collapse in the industry after world-renowned wine expert Donald J Trump criticized their product.
“He said American wine is better, and it’s true. So true. Mon Dieu, what’s to become of us!”
Proposals to try to undermine Trump’s authority on the matter were scraped after they learned he has his own winery in the state of Virginia.
“Virginia! How can we possibly compete with that?”
A quick internet search confirmed their worst fears – that Trump’s wine received rave reviews.
“It’s described as grape juice soiled with a sad stench of pure alcohol. What I would do for a review like that for my burgendy – zut alors!”