Gina Haspel Digs Out Favorite Waterboard To Bring To New Job As CIA Director

After being sworn in as the new CIA Director, Gina Haspel said it was a great honor to be in charge of the intelligence agency, and she couldn’t wait to get down to business.

“I may be a bit rusty at first when it comes to extracting intel, but I’ll soon be back in the groove I promise.”

Though she knows everything she needs will be provided for her, Haspel came equipped with her own waterboard.

“I’m sure I could get a new one but I prefer to use my trusty old one from Iraq – call me sentimental!”

Though it was expected she would socialize at the reception with refreshments after the swearing in, Haspel did not stay long.

“I’ll just stay long enough to grab a pitcher of water if you don’t mind.”

Haspel then excused herself saying there was no time like the present to get to work.

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