Saying it is long overdue, former Presidential Candidate Hillary Clinton is scheduled to deliver a State of the Washing Up address this evening at her home in New York State.

“The State of the Washing Up is Not Done.”

In attendance will be 42nd President of the United States, William Jefferson Clinton.

“Might I remind those in the audience that I did it last time.”

Sources close to the former First Lady say the message she plans to deliver is a pragmatic one in which she acknowledges the period of discord we are in, but which also expresses for hope for the future.

“With God’s grace and a bit of elbow grease by someone I’m looking at right now, I trust we will pull through this difficult time to welcome a new age of an empty sink and everything back in its proper place.”

For his part, Bill Clinton said he plans to offer a rebuttal to the address, in which he will question whether current policies regarding the remote control are the correct ones.