Jimmy Carter Says The ‘Gloves Are Coming Off’ During The Time He Has Left

Jimmy Carter is speaking out.No more Mister Nice Guy.

Former U.S. President and Nobel Prize winning humanitarian Jimmy Carter is no spring chicken anymore and a recent bout with cancer was a reminder of his and everyone else’s mortality. He is relaxed and ready for whatever the future holds, and hopes to continue as before as long as his health permits it. One thing he says he will change during the time he has left is he is no longer going to hold his tongue about all the idiocy that he has had to put up with during his 90+ years on the planet.

“I may be a gentle peanut farmer from Georgia at heart, but – make no mistake – there’s going to be some tongue-lashings over the next few weeks that would make a sailor blush.”

The nonagenarian – who, lest it be forgot, was a Navy submariner who served his county unlike some former Presidents that he could, and now probably will, mention – said the stakes are just too high to allow decorum to prevent him from letting certain groups of people know exactly what a bunch of selfish hypocritical dangerous misogynistic uncaring racist greedy aggrandizing asswipes they really are.

“Did someone just say Big Business, the Religious Right, the Republican Party, and many Democrats too? Yeah – I did. Deal.”

Though his stature has grown immensely during his post-presidency, Carter’s brief tenure in the White House is still held in relatively low esteem as a period of stagnancy and underachievement. Though he readily acknowledges there is some truth to that, his response to those who claim he achieved nothing is terse and to the point.

“Camp David Accords, jackholes. Look it up.”

Another thing he is proud of is the fact that his presidency was a period when the United States did not engage in any wars. On hearing that Fox News is using this to accuse him of being weak-kneed, Carter immediately grabs an aide’s phone so he can tweet a swift rebuttal.

“Hey @FoxNews did it ever occur 2u that it takes an even stronger man 2b prepared 2 look weak? Think about it, Einsteins. #RogerAilesBlows”

This is followed by a barrage of posts detailing how his efforts in the Middle East led to a lasting framework for peace as opposed to the unholy clusterfuck [sic] their favorite son George ‘Dubya’ saddled the world with. When asked if he’s going to give critic Ted Cruz a dose of his real talk during the upcoming Republican primary race, Carter demurs.

“He’s kind of like a yappy little dog that is constantly nipping at your heels – you want to teach it a lesson it won’t forget but you just can’t bring yourself to do so because it’s so utterly pathetic.”

Carter says, when the time comes, he is ready to meet his maker. He remains deeply religious despite all the cruelty and injustice that God permits in the world, though that is something he does not intend to keep quiet about in the afterlife.

“We’ll be having words.”

50 Comments on "Jimmy Carter Says The ‘Gloves Are Coming Off’ During The Time He Has Left"

  1. President Carter was the PEACE president . That is all that needs to be said!

  2. Lance Ferguson | August 22, 2015 at 10:20 pm |

    GOOD! I look forward to President Carter RAILING at these F***ers.

    I wish him the best, but I’m not optimistic about a 90 year old surviving chemotherapy.

  3. Phil Kawaguchi | August 22, 2015 at 10:42 pm |

    Imagine how many presidents and congressmen would start wars if they, along with their children, had to go fight in them. As on the playground, the toughest guys aren’t the ones with the biggest mouths.

  4. President Carter, I love you! Thank you for all you have done for this Nation and for humanity!
    PS…Tell us the secrets about UFO’s!

  5. Connie Schiro | August 23, 2015 at 1:30 am |

    I just wish you would have been as forthright and angry about these people/issues when you were President. Sending blessings your way to be healed.

  6. Barbara Lmbert | August 23, 2015 at 2:57 am |

    Give ’em hell, Mr. President!…You’ve been such a perfect gentleman all these years – now – as you said – the gloves are off!..Please, especially – kick the ass of that war monger George W Bush!..And if security allows, tell us some juicy secrets that only you know…God Bless and Keep you in His embrace, as you embark on this journey. Many prayers are with you, Mr. President, and with your lovely family…Oh, and just one more thing – please tell us how you really feel about Donald Trump’s run for President!

  7. Debbie Eklund | August 23, 2015 at 8:18 am |


  8. I am in awe of everything you’ve stood for and accomplished. You are an icon of integrity and a symbol of hope. You are the reason I have not given up believing in the possibility of another decent human being in office. Than you for everything you’ve done for the U.S. and the world.

  9. Respect beyond words. Still waiting for a President or candidate with a sliver of the integrity and love for humanity that you possess.

  10. I’ll believe it when I see it. President Carter is to much of a gentlemen to stoop to mud slinging.

  11. Frank Locke | August 23, 2015 at 10:32 am |

    You all do realize that it was Carter’s weakness that was exploited by the Muslim Extremists that gave them the sense that “The great Satan” could be attacked and eventually beaten. Their control of our oil has knead to the unending war in the middle east so that you can have cheap gas prices at the pump. Carter was such a bad leader, that our soldiers are now used as mercenaries to do the bidding of the UAA. But since none of you are old enough to remember 16% interest rates and gasoline lines, go ahead and tell us how great he was. In truth, his administration caused much of the middle east conflict by their weakness.

    • Michael Coon | August 26, 2015 at 5:52 pm |

      Your railing at President Carter being weak, on the surface seems to have some merit. We might consider however that Israel’s own ongoing aggression in the Mid East had the entire region inflamed. Starting with Israel’s “pre-emptive,” read naked aggression for territory, attacks escalated tensions, resulting in huge populations of people who had lived in these territories since about 68 CE being uprooted, driven out of their homes,igniting the continuing turmoil and bloodshed in Palestine. In the midst of all that,this man successfully negotiated the lasting peace between Israel and Egypt.

      Carter was then betrayed by his own party, creating an atmosphere that was hostile to him. The military/industrial complex was unhappy losing that market for arms sales;, and one could almost sense the retribution from OPEC for removing Egypt from the battlefield, both militarily and strategically. It led to The Egyptian president being assassinated! Prices for oil, I believe in retribution for Carters’s hand in the peace agreement, began to rise at an alarming rate.

      Like you, I was there. I saw it!

      That rise contributed to the escalation of interest rates and instability in the stock and monetary markets.

      It led to the downfall of the propped up puppet of the US, the Shah of Iran leaving the overthrowing force in control of the country, with an eye for payback for of the years of the Shah’s terror and for the disenfranchisement of the Palestinian people.

      Wasn’t it convenient that the seizing of the embassy took place almost one year to the day before the 1980 Presidential election?

      Wasn’t it convenient that Reagan announced his bid for the presidency nine days after the embassy was seized?

      Wasn’t it convenient that Reagan entered into negotiations in July of 1980, before he was president, with Iran to get the hostages freed (ironically it resulted in the illegal sales of arms to Iran) only moments after he took the oath of office?

      Here was a great man, sacrificed on the altar of political ambition, not just by his opponents, but by his own party. He contended with deception chicanery, and dare I say the treasonous actions of a political candidate, engaging in negotiations with a hostile foreign power in an election year,and using the agreement in those negotiations to guarantee his election.

      Carter deserves better! He was betrayed by his own government.

      • Michael Coon | August 26, 2015 at 5:55 pm |

        Correction; the seizing of the embassy was EXACTLY one year,to the day, before the 1980 general election.

  12. i am plenty old enough to remember. Gasoline lines were during the NIXON administration! Reagan was the one who appeased the terrorists. Right wing myths about U. S. history are amazing to behold.

    • Frank Locke | August 23, 2015 at 2:03 pm |

      So, I guess that I need to clarify and go a little further. America’s weakness in the eyes if the Califate doesn’t end with Carter. Reagan is just as much to blame as showing America’s weakness by allowing Ollie North to arm the insurgents in Afghanistan against the Russians. Bush is just as guilty for his “de-bathification” of Iraq. But before you all go off on your tangents, you really have to ask yourself, “why is oil traded in US dollars”. Those middle eastern countries have their own currencies. Think about it. We are now doing the bidding of the House of Saud. American blood for oil.

  13. By the way, we purchased our first home in 1971 and the mortgage interest rates were somewhere near 13%. I suggest you look up who was president. The nasty inflation during the mid 70s was during the Nixon/Ford administrations (Nixon initiated price controls). Look it up, unless you live in one of the states where all of the history textbooks have been altered. Also, we do have the Internet. Research? Nah. Much easier to spout right wing bs.

  14. So when Jimmy Carter stands before God, or rather, kneels (Romans 14:11), He really thinks that he will be more righteous than the perfect, living God?? Someone please point out to him which god it really is that this world follows in 2 Corinthians 4:4. This world follows Lucifer, not Jehovah. It’s been that way since Adam lost dominion to him in Eden. That’s why conventional wisdom is almost all wrong, because he is a liar. It’s also why there is violence and wars, because world rulers follow Lucifer’s example; he was a murderer from the beginning as Christ Himself stated (John 8:44). If you’re so “religious” Mr. President, then why don’t you understand this? I understand your frustration for so many professing Christians following a Luciferian whose father called for a “New World Order”, I.E., a global government, exactly 10 years before 9/11 on September 11, 1991 in front of congress. I share that same frustration. The Church’s discernment is non-existent. But read Psalm 2, none of this should be a surprise to anyone. When you stand before the Father, guess what, He’s going to reveal to you that He already revealed all of this in His Word, and you will have no excuse for not knowing it. (Romans 1:20, Hosea 4:6)

    • U a fruitcake

    • President Carter never said he was more righteous than God. Where are you getting this stuff from? Your commentary does not make any sense at all. President Carter was a kind and peaceful man and led by example. You sound like a nut case.

  15. Simple research and remembrance by those of us that lived during the sixties & seventies know thar all of the problems began under Johnson. In the seventies it was accelerated by Saidi Arabia and oil pricing. The ‘high’ interest rates continued under carter throughout his presidency. His weakness during the conflict in Iran was disasterous as well as extremely naive and childish in his belief in ‘peace’ at all costs. Even though it meant weakening America as a result. Lee, you need to pull your head out of your rear and begin to accept the truth. The liberal left in this country (yourself included) have done their best to destroy this country and our way of life. Your childish and ignorant mentality has done nothing to better this country. All you care about is anything and everything immoral and vulgar. I’ll lay a donut to a dollar you didn’t and haven’t done anything in your life for this country. Go to Europe with the rest of your yippy, dippy, hippies.

    • Here we are paying homage to a great humanitarian who at the age of 90 has to fight a possibly fatal disease and your tirades of nonsense have to get in the way. Take your right wing distorted gibberish elsewhere you jackass.

    • Seriously, more from the rw nuthouse! You make assertions you can NOT back up and end by calling those who disagree with you “hippies” – REALLY? And you know this…..HOW? Oh I know, the same way you know all of our woes were caused by “liberals”, who have NOT BEEN IN CHARGE anything – regardless of what you guys continue to spew [and no, Obama is NOT a liberal – but, details, details, right?!]….all you want is sound bites and hatred, which Fox and their ilk are feeding to you like babies [and I question whether they are wrong when I see this crud] – happy now that you’ve blamed “liberals” and “hippies” for everything? I’ll bet you are.

      FACTS are that Carter launched an attempt to get the hostages out and I bet you’ve NEVER ever wondered HOW it went so wrong? Of course not; you folks never seem to bother with facts. Ever wonder why they were released as soon as Reagan got elected? Of course you haven’t! deals were made…..and Carter got screwed. But don’t bother yourself with the boring “details”….might give you a headache 🙁

      In closing, Since you don’t know the facts about anything you stated…..Go watch some more Fox and stop boring us with your juvenile B.S; So sick of you holier-than-thou people continuing to defend the WORST in America while being incapable of doing your homework and giving credit to those who DESERVE IT [Carter did NOT control the gas prices [did you blame Bush for them? (I’m betting you didn’t)],and he damned sure didn’t kiss or hold the hands of the family of those who attacked us on 9/11 – nor would he have….do you know who did? Do you know who helped Osama’s family FLEE the minute it happened? Look it up if not – it’s not THAT difficult. THAT WAS BUSH!!!

    • Fred, you’re pretty decent at calling people names and assigning guilt. Well I’m a gay Vietnam veteran, and a liberal. I spent a year in Vietnam providing emergency medical service to my fellow GIs. Your post says more about you yourself than about Jimmy Carter or liberals or anyone else. Someone like you should think twice before you post such drivel and expose yourself for who and what you really are.

  16. Steve Josephson | August 23, 2015 at 1:09 pm |

    President Carter, I at age 21 was so privileged to pull the lever for you and Walter Mondale. I think history will show that you were indeed a peace president, and that our country would have done much better under your two terms followed by two terms of Mondale. The consequences ofreagonomics, two bushes, and the sinister cheney led neo cons have totally gutted our dear country. Yes I too feel we have devolved into an oligarchy. President, we still need you. I pray that your cancer will be healed, because we definitely need your wisdom. Yet I know you are hidden with Christ in God. All my love to you dear President. I and all my family here in Minnesota, we all love you. Rev Steven Josephson. Chaplain U.S. Army Ret

  17. I lived through the 50’s, 60’s, 70’s, 80’s 90’s 20’s, and 10’s. I bought a nice house in the early 70’s for $5,000. And a brand new car off the show room floor for $2,500. I wondered how in the hell and I going to pay for these. To say the Liberals are the ones who caused the Gas Prices to rise is really ignorant. Nixon was in power, and the Gas lines were on his watch. Remember Peak Oil was reported by scholars to be 1976. This was before Carter. Between Nixon, Ford, and Reagan they threw the doors open to China. Where are your jobs? China. Carter got a lasting Peace agreement that still stands to this day. How many wars have the GOP gotten us into since Nixon? If War and the Status Quo of Corporate America now running the Country, and Money in Politics, you can go no farther than the Big Donors to the GOP. Yeah, Unions are Big Donors too, why? Because they fight for the working man. Where is the Middle Class these days? Sold to cheap labor. How’s that working out for you???

  18. Carter: Great President.If we had followed his ideas we would be in better shape now. I hope he really rips the conservatives until the world is laughing at them. Wait, they already are. No matter, get in there and kick some butt JImmy. HUrry!

  19. Y’all realize this is satire, right?

    • Dr. Hardcrab | August 25, 2015 at 6:56 am |

      I know, right? I mean come on! Do these people really think he’d tweet stuff like that?

  20. I question the alleged quotes use in the article by the blogger. I don’t recall any such words at President Carter’s press conference and they don’t sound dignified and decent former president who has not shied from speaking truth all these years. I’d like to know the source of these alleged quotes and ig that can’t be done, the blogger should retract his blog.

  21. HEY!!! This information is FALSE and from a SATIRICAL Blog. Carter may speak out wisely and strongly about many things before he passes on from this world. But he is NOT going to be saying the kind of garbage that this fake article claims. HE IS A FAR BETTER MAN THAN TO STOOP TO THE LEVEL OF INSULTS AND FALSEHOODS FROM MOST OF THE CURRENT PRESIDENTIAL CANDIDATES!

  22. The word has changed a lot since Carter was in the White House. Carter had to manage the Iranian takeover of the American Embassy. He worked very hard on this project perhaps to the detriment of domestic agenda. He sent in a special forces group which would have probably worked except the helicopter crashed. Not Carter’s fault. I think he is a great man. We need more like him rather than the kind of people which now populate the political field.

  23. Cheeses Twice & Holy Carp, y’all! READ the name of this blog, pull-eeez! It’s right at the top and there’s a subtitle and e’thing! I swear, y’all are the same folks who screech about “quotes” in The Onion and The Daily Currant as if they’re the gospel truth. To those who are scroll-impaired, this is “Breaking Burgh, A SATIRICAL blog serving Western Pennsylvania and beyond. Now go to any of the many dictionaries on line and look up “satire, satirical.” ‘kthnx, bai.

  24. I love they way you ‘tards make this all about your problems! Grow up. Wish Jimmy could do something about you trolls.

  25. margaret m brower | August 24, 2015 at 4:52 pm |

    Thank you President Carter for being the wonderful person you were then and still are today. We have all been blessed to have had the few years of your leadership altho many of us may have been too ignorant to know it then. Blessings on you, your family. May you be healed to continue to show us how to live.

  26. Dear President Carter,
    May you continue to be blessed in your ongoing journey. Your wisdom, humility and service have been an inspiration to us. We will not forget.
    Anthony Ercolano

  27. Steven Goossen | August 24, 2015 at 8:25 pm |

    Jimmy, for a 90 year old peanut farmer, you’re alright! I grow peaches in California, I hear peaches are pretty good in Georgia, what do you think? Thank you for being the tough guy and taking it all these years. God bless you as you continue on your journey. Praying for you and your family. Amen.

  28. Dick Gaskill | August 24, 2015 at 11:26 pm |

    Please tell us what you know about area 51 or if you just can’t can you say If you ever went there and can anyone prevent a president from really knowing what’s there. Is there a book of presidents secrets like that. Were there aliens or not on earth.? If you can’t say because of such damage that might be done can you at least say whether you really do or don’t know anything about it. Do you also know the whole truth about Fort Knox and what is or isn’t in there? If we can’t know the truth because of security can you even say whether you know or don’t know the truth.
    Or is all this a total secret to even you. Thanks a bunch.

  29. Yvonne Wisdom | August 25, 2015 at 5:58 am |

    If JC reads this I would like to say that I always thought he was one of the good guys! SO GO FOR IT JIMMY!! I live in Highland Perthshire, Scotland, UK and I wholeheartedly agree with his comments about politics, even here in the UK they leave an awful lot to be desired! Our thoughts and good wishes go with you and sorry to hear about your health issues. Kind regards Yvonne

  30. Go get em Jimmy. Sending love your way.

  31. NancyJean Teague | August 25, 2015 at 11:04 pm |

    Could it be he can cleanse himself of his Anti Jewish biases before he dies. I’d like Jimmy to address that

    ugly portion of himself.

  32. It’s a slow news day when the stock market stays normal and Trump doesn’t do anything outrageous that you feel the need to fill your column with a redemption piece on Jimmy Carter. I hope his health stabilizes and admit he’s been a good humanitarian since he left office but his real claim to fame is that he has lived long enough for a new president to take the mantle of worst president off his shoulders. I’m sure he’s glad Mr. Obama came along.

  33. Stephen Berk | August 26, 2015 at 3:23 pm |

    One of Carter’s greatest and most prescient actions (which he was pilloried for at the time) was to warn the country that there is an “energy crisis,” that we need to switch to renewables, and that Americans needed to conserve and to consume less. Carter was followed by Reagan, who had the solar cells Carter had installed on the White House ripped off. What if Americans had actually listened to Carter and Gore? Maybe we wouldn’t be staring down the barrel of ecocide.

  34. Harry Thibedeau | August 27, 2015 at 1:50 am |

    Sad to hear that he has cancer…and I wish him the best…But, that said, he was a terrible President. He simply could not make a decision…he was like a deer in the headlights of history. I’m wondering how long he agonized every day over the color socks to wear???

  35. Jimmy Carter’s legacy will always be be tied to his big lie that Israel is an Apartheid state when in fact its Arab citizens enjoy more rights in Israel then they would in any Arab nation. Moreover,  he never fully understood that the war between the Arabs and Jews was ongoing and would end if the Arabs would simply accept a non-Muslim state in their midst.

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