Lions Who Killed Poacher Claim He Was Armed

A pack of lions were being demonized on social media today for killing a man, until a new twist emerged which changed everything.

“He had a firearm.”

The lions, speaking through their attorney, announced they will assert self-defense if prosecuted, as they had a reasonable expectation that their lives were in danger.

“If we hadn’t acted decisively, we might not be here now.”

Their case is reportedly strengthened by corroborating evidence from a witness.

“We have an antelope who says she saw everything.”

More tricky for the lions’ defense team will be explaining why they ate the man afterwards.

“We’ll cross that bridge when we come to it.”

161 Comments on "Lions Who Killed Poacher Claim He Was Armed"

  1. No jury will convict them for “standing” their ground against breaking and entering. (They have a Florida lawyer.)

  2. As an ELK, I stand with the lions. That is one less poacher after me, my family and lodge brothers (& sisters).

  3. Brenda Stewart | April 20, 2019 at 9:10 am | Reply

    I thought the elephants killed the poacher and the lions were just hiding the body.

  4. Willy Mannili | April 18, 2019 at 3:28 pm | Reply

    The poachers name was not Miranda, therefore he was not due any pre-meal reading of his rights. Picking their teeth after a dessert of Key Lime pie, the lions were quoted “he got his just desserts, and we did too.”

  5. Ya but are they legal?

  6. NEWS FLASH ………..THIS JUST IN !
    Dem. Jerry Nadler, NY ( formerly known as Captain Weeble,has announced the subpoenas of all records and testimony of this “colossal tragedy”.
    “We also want the tax returns of both lions and the antelope!
    We know that Donald Trump has thought about the African Continent at some time in his life and thus, he has abetted this horrendous crime, which is obviously a consideration in any impeachment trial.”

  7. ‘We didn’t do nothin, we didn’t see nothin & we don’t know nothin.’

  8. Good job beautiful kitties!!
    All poachers should become lunch for the wild animals they’re hunting!!

  9. This is some seripusly funny shit😂😂

  10. What do they expect from wild animals? A medal?

  11. They liked Poached I mean Poacher eggs for breakfast

  12. For me I’m on “de fence” but leaning towards the lions side. Perhaps it is more of a gang “pride” thing, also. As far as eating the poacher, he got his just “desserts” or maybe the “mane” course. Lol

  13. If you ask me perhaps we should be concerned more about human on human crime than what the lions did.

  14. It seems the killer have not seen the Lion KING FILM.

  15. He got what he deserved and i’m not sorry for him.It is illegal to hunt them especially in a reserve.Why didn’t his family stop him from poaching?They would have known,what he was doing.He knew the risk and how many poachers have killed rangers,that are protecting the wild animals and their family have lost their bread winner?

  16. He got what he deserved and i’m not sorry for him.It is illegal to hunt them especially in a reserve.Why didn’t his family stop him from poaching?They would have known,what he was doing.He knew the risk and how many poachers have killed rangers,that are protecting the wild animals and their family have lost their bread winner?

  17. The Comments. I’m crying😅😅🤣🤣

  18. I want to know if the family of the poachers forgave the lions for eating him.

  19. They had good reason to eat them, they didn’t want all that good meat to go to waste

  20. Thats what he gets for wearing a MAGA hat…. Trump has divided us.. lol

  21. Chop well boys

  22. I am for the Lions … ALL should be killed who wants to kill these beautiful animals.

  23. I think there is some confusion the Lions are not lie/ing , Give these beautiful animals their just due or they might eat you ,Ha Ha Go LIONS GO …….

  24. Susan Freeman | April 12, 2019 at 7:13 pm | Reply

    🎶 In the Jungle,the mighty jungle, the lions eat tonight.🎶
    Just sayin……

  25. Justine Thornton | April 12, 2019 at 2:59 pm | Reply

    Just love it!! Time for our wildlife to fight back!!

  26. Hmmm I had heard the elephant killed him.. The lions just cleaned up the mess.. The evidence must be tainted

  27. Bonnie Spoelman | April 12, 2019 at 1:52 pm | Reply

    This is the best!! Had a very cleansing fit of laughter. LOLLOLLOLOLOL!!!

  28. Thorold DeMercado | April 12, 2019 at 9:52 am | Reply

    Do you think the lions had “mental health” issues?

  29. whoops – doubling-up there. That’s what you do when your comment suddenly disappears! Never mind – a second helping for the lions – of a rather doubled-up poacher.

  30. A shame there wasn’t any water handy; they could have had poached poacher.
    sprinkled with the as/sault.

    A shame there was no water handy; they could have had poached poacher; sprinkled with the as/sault.

  31. the testimony of the antelope is not reliable because the lions forced here to do so threatened she will be eaten too. that is what is the dead man’s attorney arguing

  32. Armed and dangerous those animals did not deserve to die he did for poaching them fuck him!

  33. It’s SO much fun being “eaten”!!MMMmmmmmmm!!!!

  34. sherri leach | April 10, 2019 at 6:58 pm | Reply

    The lion were doing the what was natural to them , being lions , after all they are wild animals . no one on gods green earth can fault them for them for that , that is what they are wild animals and they will act accordingly , and no man or creature could take that for them . so I general that is not their fault . the poachers knew they were treading on dangerous grounds and took their own life in their hands, that was their mistake , and their poor judgement . if anybody knows who is their right mind , these are wild animals ad you do not mess with them no matter what! PERIOD!!!!

  35. The poacher was trying to cross staid Lions with a firearm. He deserved what happened.

  36. Starve a cold, feed a fever. Jungle fever.

  37. ‘Lions sue for serious indigestion (poacheritis)”

  38. Am told they mistook him for a monkey him being a nudist and all, so definitely they’ll condsider using mistaken identity as well. 😂

  39. Even if the poacher was not armed, the lions claim they would still have exacted the same defensive measures especially considering the horrible pain of being caught in a snare – which all agreed would have been highly probable considering the human condition…

  40. This is the best ever of the Lions 1 Poachers 0 I had to read it all Hilarious comments It really is the Lions home and intruders should be aware of the consequences. Just about the time I stopped laughing I read another and started again.

  41. These lions were originally from Florida, where the “Stand Your Ground” law permits one to kill a trespasser who might harm you. How were they to know that such a law doesn’t exist universally. The lions did confide that they argued among themselves as to whether the hunters left a slightly bitter or sour taste in the mouth. They did confirm that those with the need to prove their manhood with big guns were compensating for their small…. oh, we can’t print that?

  42. Stupid should hurt!

  43. Thinking ahead on the topic of poaching
    Rhino hunters have just been sentenced to 25 years in S Africa.
    Perhaps they should start by serving their time in the middle of the game reserve – but without the guns this time
    I mean, she we feed the poachers for 25 years, or feed the lions?

  44. Glynn m Battye | April 8, 2019 at 6:08 pm | Reply

    I believe the elephant was to blame the lions just cleaned up the mess

  45. Waste not, want not!

  46. he was armed and both arms were delicious …the lions

  47. Lions Rule,Humans drool..You Get em Lions!!What’s the score?

  48. The poacher was going to set up a windmill, they were scared of cancer!

  49. D.p de jonge | April 8, 2019 at 11:54 am | Reply

    He had an expiry date tattoed on him

  50. Sounds like a purrrrrrrrrrrrrr-fect defence to me…

  51. Yogi and BooBoo | April 7, 2019 at 1:13 pm | Reply

    All lions were busy, and declined to comment.

  52. #poachersrcrap | July 12, 2018 at 3:24 pm | Reply

    It is true that the lions may have coerced the antelope’s testimony. However, our reporter has access to secret drone footage which clearly shows that the dictionary definition of ‘poacher’ involves said being’s intent to inflict grievous bodily harm on poachees. Lions acted in proactive self-defense and should be exonerated. In addition if you would like to contribute to their defence fund, please send donations to grrrrrrrrrrrr.org.globe

  53. The article on 7/10/18 said that this cretin not only was armed, as the weapon had been found, but that he had already shot and killed a lion cub! He got what he deserved.

  54. Marty Thurman | July 12, 2018 at 12:11 am | Reply

    This is totally unjustified! #poacherslivesmatter

  55. Black lions matter.

  56. The lions did what they should have they need to be left alone in case other idiot poachers try this again

  57. Lions 1 Poachers 0

  58. Your honor, the deceased WAS armed; but due to his own poor decisions in life, the dearly departed is now dis-armed, and as the crime scene was contaminated by the hyenas, we can only assume that he was dis-legged as well. The defense rests.

  59. No antelope is going to back up a lion’s story! More like “antelope says lions were unprovoked”

  60. They are my distant cousins, and they are not violent. I am sure the man was armed or at least before they ate him. They had to disarm him!

  61. Michelle Sinnott | July 9, 2018 at 1:34 pm | Reply

    Lions are entitled to their “Pride” . They’re way ahead of the “pack”.. (satire or not I hate stupidly written articles!)

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  63. Are the lions from Detroit or Chicago?

  64. Robert L. Bennie | February 21, 2018 at 8:43 am | Reply

    Cops have been told that “I feared for my life” is their get out of murder free card. This shall pass when we stop training mentally unstable people to become peace keepers. I remember when a cop’s directives were to serve and protect, keep the peace, prevent crime and enforce the law in THAT order. The ‘militarization’ of local police forces is absurd and visually anathema. Street executions are un-american and inhuman.

  65. Sneffleberry Finn | February 21, 2018 at 7:05 am | Reply

    YEAH. OKAY. HAHA. GO LIONS.

    I WILL ASK YOU THIS QUESTION THOUGH:

    LET’S JUST SAY THAT THIS ARTICLE IS A METAPHOR OF SORTS… THE POACHER REPRESENTS AN EVIL MAN THAT IS LOOKING TO LOCATE, SHOOT, AND KILL MASSES OF INNOCENT PEOPLE, FOR NO REASON OTHER THAN BECAUSE HE WANTS TO. THE LIONS REPRESENT THOSE COMPLETELY INNOCENT PEOPLE THAT HE FINDS. NOW, SINCE THESE ARE HUMANS, AND NOT LIONS… HOW EXACTLY WOULD YOU EXPECT THEM TO HAVE ANY CHANCE OF PROTECTING AND DEFENDING THEMSELVES, IF NOT A SINGLE ONE OF THEM HAS A GUN?! PEPPERSPRAYS, TASERS, KNIVES, ETC. ARE NO MATCH FOR A FIREARM.

    (…BECAUSE IN THIS WONDERFUL VERSION OF AMERICA, THAT YOU ALL WANT SO BADLY, OWNING A FIREARM IS PROHIBITED)

    *AND PLEASE, DON’T GIVE ME THE RIDICULOUS ANSWER THAT “THE EVIL MAN WOULDN’T HAVE A GUN EITHER, BECAUSE THEY ARE BANNED!” BECAUSE THAT IS AN ASININE ANSWER. IT’S JUST AVOIDING THE ACTUAL QUESTION, AND TRYING TO SHUT DOWN THE TOPIC AT HAND, WITHOUT GIVING ANY KIND OF REAL, VALID, ANSWER. CRIMINALS WILL ALWAYS BE ABLE TO ACQUIRE FIREARMS IF THEY SHOULD SO DESIRE, LEGAL OR NOT; THEY DON’T CARE. IF THERE IS A BAN ON FIREARMS… THE LAW WILL NOT KEEP ANY CRIMINAL FROM GETTING THEIR HANDS ON A GUN, AND MOVING FORWARD WITH THEIR INTENTIONS. BAD PEOPLE ARE BAD PEOPLE. IF YOU’RE WILLING TO SHOOT AND KILL INNOCENT PEOPLE, YOU SURE AS HELL DON’T CARE IF YOU HAVE TO BREAK THE LAW IN ORDER TO GET A GUN.

    PLEASE, I TRULY WANT TO KNOW ALL OF YOUR ANSWERS. I WANT TO BETTER UNDERSTAND YOUR POINT OF VIEW!

  66. Pedro Velazquez | February 20, 2018 at 9:01 pm | Reply

    I think they have a solid Stand Your Ground defense.

  67. I need the address for these lions because I want to send them each a bag of treats for a job WELL DONE!! GOOD kitties!

  68. What goes around comes around!Stop killing animals for sport.

  69. The man was not eaten to destroy the evidence ! When man kills something on the road he is expected to take it home and eat it. It’s called Road Kill ! They said out of respect for the dead Leave the head for the family n friends !

  70. WOOHOO! GO LIONS!

  71. “Until lions have their own storytellers the tale will always be told by the hunters” African Proverb…I guess the lions can tell their own truths now.

  72. Junk food really will give you indigestion

  73. Sterling & Susan Richards | February 17, 2018 at 8:18 pm | Reply

    It may sound cruel, but I am loving this story, and all the comments. It’s about time the animal won. WooHoo!

  74. It may sound cruel, but, I am loving this story and all these comments. It’s about time the animals won. lmao…

  75. Why they ate the man ? Well that’s simple to explain … Lions do not litter … so they had to eat the man. Has anyone ever seen garbage in the jungle ?

  76. jeanette voisin | February 17, 2018 at 5:40 pm | Reply

    If you feel bad take tums

  77. They’re still pissed off about the killing of CECIL…..Lions don’t forget !!! Stop the poaching idiots !!!

  78. The monkey in the tree above them notified them of the approaching danger and they were able to subdue the attacker to protect there Wives and Family…as well as provide a meal

  79. Good on you, lions. Keep up the great work!

  80. You just can’t take that lion down!

  81. POACHED HUNTER IS PROBABLY ON THE SAVANNAH MENU NOW. THING IS, THE HUNTER CLEARLY THOUGHT THAT HE WAS AHEAD OF THE GAME, AND IT TURNS OUT HE WAS DEAD RIGHT!

  82. Asked if they couldn’t have just walked away, the lion’s attorney replied “Not these lions. They have their pride.”

  83. I was always told not to kill anything I would not eat, they were just doing the right thing and not littering the jungle with a pesky poacher’s body

  84. Even if the dead poacher was a poor man working for the main bad guys, this may make it harder to fill the job position in the future.

  85. These Lions are totally innocent. Self defence is no offence, even if the aggressor tasted good.

  86. These Lions are innocent. Self defence is no offence, even if the aggressor tasted good.

  87. Can’t say it’s not justice, but often if not always, the poachers who do the killing are poor members of the surrounding communities who are desperate for work and hired by those who would never risk their own lives, but seek to make huge profits. Not sure if it’s true for lions, but it’s certainly true for those who hunt elephants.

  88. If this goes to trial…I hope I get on the jury. This should teach those poachers what happens when they run around carrying guns. AND hey….if you’re going to kill something, it really should be eaten, not wasted…………LOVE IT!

  89. Roxan H. Caillet | February 15, 2018 at 5:13 pm | Reply

    Thanks for the pants peeing comments on here! You guys have made my day! Go Lions (all of them, whether lying or not!)

  90. Neill Peterson | February 15, 2018 at 1:07 pm | Reply

    No law against eating carrion — that’s part of what lions do. Eat dead things.

  91. Ive seen photos here of hunted Cougars. Im a prophet me and 10 others saw fires in the entire sky.in amazing!!!visions. Everything is going to change.God sainted me for donating the 4th antiviral peg interferon 1989.170.000.000 people saved or more.we will win

  92. Have they really been “demonized” on social media, or…lionized?

  93. The poacher was easy prey for the pride of lions , just grab him before he can press the trigger and the meal will be tastier than the tough buffalo meat.
    Good lesson to other would be poachers . Change your career , Now !

  94. Gordon Bellinger | February 15, 2018 at 12:48 am | Reply

    And this is how Narratives are created, whether false or somewhat true. Lol
    What do you think?

  95. The lions demanded a jury of their peers. After only a few hours of deliberation, the tigers, jaguars, and leopards found the lions innocent of all charges and sent them back to the jungle.

  96. Spoke to the defense lawyers, apparently prosecution cannot prove intent, as it was only self defense and therefore there was no mens rea and that actus reus cannot be applied on an involuntary act of defense. The counsel for the defendant will be claiming the disposal of evidence is of cultural significance of “waste not, want not”.

  97. I don’t know how the defense will go, after all they shouldn’t have tried to get rid of the evidence.

  98. Lions 1 Poacher 0

  99. A Poacher a is poacher is a poacher… End of story, no case here. Certainly no harm, no foul. Go Lions!

  100. Vincient Williams | February 14, 2018 at 8:30 pm | Reply

    Way down in the jungle deep. The bad ass lion got some poaching asshole to eat.

  101. I am on the Lions side no question! It’s the jungle, be eaten or get eaten. I talked to the Antelope (who saw it all), the poacher was getting ready to shoot. Thank God a lion saw him, and jumped him!! Eating was just after thought. The Lions are definitely innocent! They should sue the family of the poacher for their injuries.

  102. ” We’re hungry for trump jrs.”…

  103. I’m joining the Lion’s Club, I’m so proud of them.

  104. They did it on purpose. Those felions are lion. And the antelope that claim to have seen the whole thing is probably lion also.
    We want Justice for Elmer!!

  105. The African jungle is “Stand your ground” territory, y’all!

  106. Lion Live Matter! You go Lions!

  107. The poacher was trespassing and “to bad so sad” for him…. One up for the lions. It is about time they fought back against the dam poachers…. you go lions and others in the jungle!!!!

  108. Hi lions you did very well. Waste no time. Eat any one holding that crazy metal things, especially the creatures walking on two legs.

  109. They ate the man because their mom told them never to waste food. She would say, “Think of all the starving lions in Africa “.

  110. Technically, lions mark their territory which could be several sq miles. And the law of the jungle, in this case savannah… Is dibs on intruders. So the lions have that right to eat anything that moves. I am not an attorney but I grew up in a barrio that pretty much followed the same rules.

  111. Speaking on behalf of all vegans – this is justice. ALL hunters should be eaten!

  112. LION “self-advocacy”!!

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