(The White House) First Lady Melania Trump has described rampant criticism of this year’s Christmas décor as wildly premature and unfair as she has not even finished it yet.
“Once the dead goat heads and pentacles are added it will all make sense.”
She said it was terribly unfair for her trees dipped in the blood of newborn lambs slayed upon the alter of darknesss to be the subject of such scrutiny before she had a chance to properly adorn them with the Sigil of the Baphomet.
“That’s like judging the Rockefeller tree before the ribbons and ball ornaments have been put on.”
She was quick to respond to suggestions that a more traditional décor of holly wreathes and festive garland should have been used.
“Oh I think this is much more appropriate for this White House. Don’t you?”