Murder Hornets Brought In To Enforce Stay-At-Home Orders

Given numerous protests against the shutdown and poor compliance with stay-at-home orders across the country, a crack team of murder hornets has been brought into the United States from Asia to assist with enforcement. Governors praised the homicidal insects for providing a powerful deterrent to maintain social distancing.

“You won’t be so keen to go outside knowing one of these bad boys is out to get you.”

President Trump was quick to take credit for the idea, saying he came up with it all by himself. Medical experts say if that is true it could be a turning point in his approach to the crisis.

“As his ideas go this would have to be one of the President’s finest.”

One issue that hasn’t been addressed, however, is the departure of the murder hornets once the coronavirus is under control. The White House sought to reassure the native bee population who expressed concern.

“The murder hornets’ working visas are only for six months, after which ICE will make sure they leave.”

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5 Comments on "Murder Hornets Brought In To Enforce Stay-At-Home Orders"

  1. Someone will pass this on as truth and it will go from mouth to mouth.

  2. For all the stupid people, let me define the word
    SATIRE: (noun) “the use of humor, irony, exaggeration, or ridicule to expose and criticize people’s stupidity or vices, particularly in the context of contemporary politics and other topical issues.”

  3. If you all believe this article, you’ve been stung already and need to get to the hospital! You’re delirious! It’s a joke kids! Hahaha? Please tell me you knew it was satire!

  4. Randy Eutsler | May 5, 2020 at 12:48 am | Reply

    Liberals will pull anything to try to put Trump down.

  5. Marie Coppinger | May 4, 2020 at 6:01 pm | Reply

    This is fake news at its finest! What a bunch of bull! There must be crazy people that love this stuff? I ain’t drinking the kool aid!

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