Rick Perry Pleads Ignorance Of Ukraine Call And All Else That Is Knowable Before House
Called to appear before the House to explain what he knows regarding the Ukraine call at the center of the impeachment inquiry, DOE chief Rick Perry today pleaded ignorance. “I want this committee to understand…
Theatre Review: Feeling Very #MedeaNotMedea In Carnegie
Note: As we begin our soft expansion to a complete news and entertainment portal we are starting to post some of that content. This is a real show – no joke! What: Not Medea by…
Donald Trump Jr Deeply Saddened By Elephant Deaths In Thailand “They had so much life to live before I shot them”
News that six wild elephants died at a waterfall in Thailand trying to save one of their number has saddened people the world over, but none more than Presidential son Donald Trump Jr. “It’s such…
Theatre Review: Pittsburgh Public Handles A Few Good Men With Aplomb
Note: As we begin our soft expansion to a complete news and entertainment portal we are starting to post some of that content. This is a real show – no joke! What: A Few Good…
White House Establishes Free Hotline For Foreign Leaders To Dish Dirt On Bidens
Triplying down on his asserted right to encourage foreign governments to hobble his political opponents, President Trump today announced he has set-up a free hotline for overseas leaders to undermine Joe Biden anyway they can….
Roethlisberger Contemplating Retirement To Realize Dream Of Opening Tea Shop
Ben Roethlisberger has announced he is considering retirement from the NFL. Though he initially cited age and his elbow injury as factors, the two-time Super Bowl champion later admitted the real reason was his impatience…
Trump Demands Right To Bribe His Accuser
(The White House) President Trump has again demanded the right to confront the whistleblower who leaked damning details of a call made to the leader of Ukraine pressuring that foreign power to investigate Democrats during…
Quaker Oats Company In Crisis After Cap’n Crunch Is Accused Of Stolen Valor
The Quaker Oats company is desperately trying to salvage its reputation today following the appearance of a ‘stolen valor’ video online in which a pair of bonified sailors accuse spokesman Cap’n Crunch of pretending to…
Undercover Boss To Feature Vladimir Putin Disguised As White House Intern
Vladimir Putin may have not officially visited the United States during the current administration yet, but it was learned today he was already here briefly to film an episode of the popular CBS reality show,…
Isolated Tribe Says Trump Pressured It To Investigate Democrats
(Acre, Brazil) As more and more countries reveal that President Trump pressured them to intervene in domestic US politics to his advantage, there was major anthropological news today as an isolated tribe – hitherto believed…
Theatre Review: Skeletons in the closet and everywhere else in Cambodian Rock Band
Note: As we begin our soft expansion to a complete news and entertainment portal we are starting to post some of that content. This is a real show – no joke! What: Cambodian Rock Band…
Digital Alarm Clock Celebrates Its 10,000th Role In Student Film
Saying it felt blessed for having such a successful amateur career in film, a local digital alarm clock says it expects to land many more roles in student and independent film productions for years to…
Putin Furious Trump Is Urging Other Countries To Influence US Election “That’s my job!”
(The Kremlin) Russian President Vladimir Putin is said to be fuming today after being briefed on President Trump’s phonecall with his Ukrainian counterpart. “This is an outrage!” Putin left no-one in any doubt that he…
European Union Puts United Kingdom Out Of Its Misery By Drowning It
The vexing issue of Brexit was finally put to rest today, as the European Union took the unilateral act of drowning the United Kingdom to put it out of its misery. EU Commission President Jean-Claude…
Ukraine Relieved To Get Back To Civil War After Hectic Week With Trump
(Kiev) Ukrainians were said to be happy today as they threw themselves back to fighting insurgents in the eastern part of the country. “Finally something to take our minds off that awful man!” Following allegations…
Iran To Deploy Crack Brigade Of Teen Activists To Defeat Trump
The Islamic Republic of Iran is preparing for open confrontation with President Trump, saying it now has an ace up its sleeve that will ensure victory. “We have found his weak spot.” Rather than nuclear…
CBS Announces Chernobyl Sitcom To Air Next Season
Following its enormous success at the Emmys, it seems everyone has Chernobyl fever these days, and the comedy department at CBS has taken notice. “Look forward to ‘Meet The Kalaskys’ coming this spring to your…
Antonio Brown Says He’s Done Not Turning Up To Play For The NFL
NFL Wide Receiver Antonio Brown has announced his retirement from the league, saying he will no longer not turn up to play. “The days of this dog refusing to report for practice and failing to…
Melania To Inspect Every Inch Of Justin Trudeau To Make Sure He Is Not Still Blacking Up
Canadian Premier Justin Trudeau continues to face scrutiny, as yet more photographs of him blacked and browned up continue to emerge. Though it was expected that President Trump would be most interested in Trudeau’s troubles,…