At a post-game conference today, Clint Hurdle set the world of professional baseball abuzz by claiming the season is too lengthy, and should be shortened starting in 2018.
“I think I speak for most people when I say that six months of baseball is far too much.”
The Pirates manager was ready with an answer when asked how long he thought the season should be.
“Probably a week, which would mean the 2018 season would end… um… right now.”
Under Hurdle’s proposal, the title of World Series Champion would be awarded to the team with the best record overall as things stand now. With a 4-0 record following their win over Detroit on Monday afternoon, that would be the Pirates – something Hurdle says comes as a complete shock.
“Really? I’ve been far too focused on the bullpen to pay attention to the standings, but, hey, we’ll take it!”
MLB officials dismissed the proposal initially, but are now seriously considering it after learning there is a lot of support among MLB fans who realized that not having to watch a further 150+ lengthy ball games would allow them to get a lot more accomplished over the summer.
“It does makes a whole lot of sense when you think about it.”
However, Pirate majority owner Bob Nutting immediately made clear that should the season be cut to games played so far, then all tickets would be retroactively priced accordingly. He expected that would mean every fan who had watched a game so far probably owed in the vicinity of $653,000 to the Pirate management. He also stated that while he understood this might cause temporary hardships for some fans, he had no choice if he was to continue supporting his newspapers from Pirate earnings and purchasing 2nd rate ballplayers who are only there to look good. One fan, Joe Cheapseats immediately offered his first-born and took out a second mortgage on his home stating, “It’s the least I can do, after all, the Pirates came out on top this season.”
Yeah. Makes sense.
Declare the Pirates the champions.
Tickets to see games in person are way too expensive anyway.
But big question…. Do the players still get paid millions and millions?