Pittsburgh’s Self-Driving Cars Flee City Before Summer Construction Starts

Operators of Pittsburgh’s self-driving car projects, including Google, Uber, and Argo AI, found their work at a standstill today after all their autonomous vehicles went missing.

“There is not a single self-driving automobile in the city at this time.”

By using GPS tracking, it was determined that all the companies’ vehicles left the city of their own accord at around 5 am this morning.

“We believe a notice on PennDOT’s website triggered it.”

The cars using increasingly advanced technology to determine by themselves how to drive like an ‘advanced reasonable human driver’.

“Their neural nets all came up with the same answer – get the hell out of Pittsburgh before the summer construction detours are in place.”

Artificial intelligence experts were divided on how to interpret the behavior. Some said this was a failure, while others said we should be taking our cues from the self-driving cars’ decision.

“They’re way ahead of us when it comes to dealing with Pittsburgh’s traffic issues.”

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