Proving he learned nothing from George W Bush’s folly in Iraq, President Trump has embroiled the United States in yet another conflict that may prove even more disastrous than that debacle.

Saying he felt compelled to act, Trump ordered the deployment of forces to the war-torn region, called Chicago, early yesterday.

Many military experts say the mission is doomed to failure even before it’s begun, as the region is ruled by warlords, with a populace rife with tribal loyalties that knows no other way of life other than constant struggle.

“The United States has no business being in Chicago.”

They say arguments that the civilian population be helped in situ are similarly ill advised, and that the best thing would be to provide aid to help settle refugees elsewhere.

“Cleveland is quite nice despite what you hear.”

Unlike Bush who had the steadfast support of Tony Blair, Trump cannot count on British help this time around given the tenuous political situation in the United Kingdom. This is seen as a great loss, as the experience of the British Army stationed in the hellish Helmand Province in Afghanistan would have been invaluable.

“The environments are remarkably similar.”