Rest Of World Issues Travel Advisory For Those Visiting The United States

A travel advisory has been issued warning those traveling to the United States of America to exercise extreme caution during their time there. Citizens of every other country are advised to avoid confrontation with locals, and leave just as soon as they can.

The notice is not intended to apply to all 7.1 billion people who are not US residents, but only those who those who satisfy one of more of the following criteria:

Not white

Female

Gay

Transgender

Muslim

Atheist

Speak a foreign language (inc. Spanish)

Wear robes or any other funny clothing

Politically minded

Also those that decide to still go are warned to avoid the following places and activities where they could encounter trouble:

Trump rallies

Schools (elementary through college)

Dallas

Airports

Driving

The Deep South

Cinemas

Most of California

Detroit

Probably Cleveland too

Wildlife Refuges

Libraries

Urban areas

Inhabited rural areas

Many suburban areas

Political conventions

Bridges

Conversation

White anti-immigrant Anglo-Saxon Englishmen who voted to leave Europe should be fine though.

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