(North Pole) Santa Claus has issued a statement formally apologizing for any gifts that were incorrectly delivered last night and promised his customer service elves would correct things as soon as possible.
“I am deeply embarrassed by this sub-par performance.”
Though he says there is no excuse for failing to carry out the one thing he is expected to do correctly, Mr. Claus did feel the need to explain what had happened.
“I was simply overwhelmed with requests for a different President of the United States this year.”
Santa reminded everyone he is incapable of delivering a new President, which he points out is a matter for Congress and the American voting public, but added the sheer volume of lists to work through made getting to the actionable ones all the harder.
“Curiously there were many more lists than there are children in the world.”