Sole Spotify User Who Listens To Both Joe Rogan And Neil Young Torn Over Whether To Cancel Subscription

The solitary Spotify subscriber who listens to both Joe Rogan’s podcast and Neil Young’s music said today he is torn over what to do after the Canadian singer said the streaming service had to choose between them. It has since removed Young’s songs rather than drop Rogan, forcing their common fanbase of one to choose.

“The principled intelligent part of my brain is telling me to leave, but the other part is telling me to break out a tube of delicious horsepaste and stay.”

Though he can still get his Neil Young fix elsewhere, the confused fan says it’s just not the same.

“It was so nice to be able to enjoy Cinnamon Girl and an unhinged rant against sensible public health measures all on the same platform.”

He plans to ask the sole person in the world who both follows Alex Jones and is a devoted watcher of the Rachel Maddow show for advice.

“Hopefully she’ll understand my dilemma.”

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