A comprehensive survey to understand the state of mind of Americans in the 21st century has returned some very interesting findings, according to its sponsor, the Knowledge Institute of America.

“For instance, did you know that all Americans feel bored and have difficulty finding things to occupy their time?”

The survey also found that Americans are much more likely to be lonely than previously believed, and derive more satisfaction from filling out questionnaires than any other nation.

“As a joke we put a question at the end asking if they enjoyed taking surveys. Apparently everyone in America does, which is great!”

Though it was not its primary intention, the survey also revealed that the US Postal Service is terribly inefficient.

“We sent our survey out to every American household, and it appears that 99.999999% of them got lost in the mail.”