Suspended Chicago Police Officer Bringing Same Dedication To Caretaker Job With Police Union

[Chicago, IL] The Chicago Police Union has been criticized for giving employment to suspended Officer Jason Van Dyke, who is on unpaid leave while facing an indictment for first degree murder.

“Jason has been a real asset to us.”

A Police Union representative said he wasn’t going to comment on Van Dyke’s pending trial for shooting an unarmed teenager 16 times and lying about the circumstances until a video of the event was uncovered, but praised his enthusiasm in his new job, though he admits Jason sometimes goes to far.

“He’s will often decide that something needs to be fixed even though there’s nothing wrong, and then he’ll fix it many many times over until it just gets worn out.”

Union employees agree he’s causing a bit of trouble with his jump-right-in attitude, meaning things often aren’t repaired properly, but at least everyone has something to chuckle about.

“He’s kind of a break out the angle saw first, ask questions later type of caretaker.”

One of them recounted an experience when she noticed a door jamb was loose. Van Dyke was there in no time bashing the hell out of it, except it was the wrong doorframe. When she asked Van Dyke how he knew which doorframe needed to be fixed, he said he must have assumed it was the one with paneled doors.

“We had a good laugh over it, but boy does that man hate paneled doors!”

She then called an outside carpenter to fix the original problem, and the doorframe Van Dyke had worked on since he had pounded it into wood pulp in his determination to do a good job.

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