President Trump’s admission that the United States has sold Norway a large number of fighter jets – including the formidable F-52 previously known only to players of the video game Call of Duty: Advanced Warfare – has led Swedish Prime Minister Stefan Löfven to implore Trump to sell them their most advanced fighter, the Millennium Falcon.
“As President Trump and Kellyanne Conway well know, Sweden is a very dangerous place, much more than Norway. So we need the best military technology the United States can sell us to keep our people safe.”
Powered by Girodyne SRB42 sublight engines, the Millennium Falcon was originally designed as a light freighter but is now available in a military version by executive order, according to manufacturer Lockheed Martin.
“However, President Trump has mandated that the tractor beam projector capability be restricted to U.S. Armed Forces only.”
Nations that typically expect to be the first beneficiaries of advanced U.S. armament sales expressed anger they have been left out in the cold, with the loudest complaints coming from Benjamin Netanyahu.
“So much for being a friend of Israel! Sure President Trump can talk the talk, but how about selling us some ‘Tumbler’ Batmobiles and Photon Torpedoes?”