President Trump teased the press with details of his State Of The Union address this morning, revealing there would be stirring invective and a half-time show featuring Ted Nugent and Kanye West.

“Love those guys!”

Trump also reminded businesses that there is still time to book advertising during his address, and for lobbyists to pay to have their preferred issues brought up.

“I may propose to eliminate the regulations in your industry sector anyway, but why take the risk when a few million dollars will guarantee it?”

He said those who don’t have a MAGA hat yet can buy one during the address by calling the special number on the screen, and a counter displaying the current number of hats sold will be displayed too.

“Just like the do on the Home Shopping Network, because it’s fun.”

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