(The White House) In a little-noticed ceremony today, President Trump presented the Medal of Freedom to Melissa Carone, having previous granted the honorific to Representative David Nunes for his exemplary record in service to the chief executive’s ego.

The citation for the award, written by the President himself without any help, commends Carone for her services in ‘exposing voter fraud like no country has even seen’ and for ‘scoring a solid 8/10 with glasses on and her hair teased up’.

Others hoping to receive the high honor for having the right stuff in the coming weeks include the My Pillow guy, Kyle Rittenhouse, and whoever comes through with 11,780  votes in Georgia.

WE DEPEND ON YOU TO KEEP GOING!