Undecided Voters Flocking To Ken Bone’s Sweater In Record Numbers

The focus of the second Presidential debate was those undecided voters who somehow haven’t been exposed to enough endless political coverage to make their minds up. But on Sunday night they finally did, going in droves for political newcomer Ken Bone’s Sweater.

Though unlikely to win given that it is not on the ballot, Ken Bone’s Sweater could be the difference in this race due to its strong appeal to independents and swing voters.

It’s also expected to do well with voters concerned about the environment, given its progressive policies that aim to reduce fossil fuel consumption by adding layers.

Ken Bone’s Sweater is also drawing from both the Trump and Clinton camps with a strong message on defense, including a comprehensive plan to deal with the ever-present threats of ISIS and lint.

What this means come January is that the next President, whether it be the former Secretary of State or the coiner of the phrase ‘Grab Them By The Pussy’, will feel under pressure to find a role in Cabinet for the bright red knitwear that everyone is talking about.

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