United States Sentences El Chapo To Life Plus Adam Sandler Biopic

El Chapo movie starring Adam Sandler to be funded by Feds.
Image credit: adapted from adapted from ‘Adam Sandler Net Worth’ by Flickr user celebrityabc license CC BY-SA 2.0.

The drug kingpin known as ‘El Chapo’, who was previously captured by Mexican authorities, has been found guilty in a United States court.

He was caught after meeting with Sean Penn about the prospect of making an El Chapo movie. El Chapo’s carelessness didn’t come as a surprise to the Justice Department, as it was known that he was hugely jealous of Pablo Escobar having had a serious dramatic biopic made about his life starring Benetio Del Toro.

“We believe El Chapo wanted to be played by Javier Bardem.”

The importance El Chapo attached to having a critically-acclaimed biopic made about him is said to have directly inspired his punishment, beyond incarcerating him for life.

“Look forward a slapstick comedy coming soon about the clumsy El Chapo – starring Adam Sandler wearing a hilarious fake moustache – courtesy of the DOJ.”

The El Chapo movie is set to be released worldwide and will also play continuously in El Chapo’s prison cell.

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