The United States military is set to save enormous sums with the recent realization that all the expensive ammunition it pays for to feed its machine guns, artillery, and other weaponry can be replaced with rocks.

“Thank you, President Trump, for showing us the path to huge savings.”

Beyond the cost of producing ammunition, there will also be great savings in transport costs as rocks, now known to be as effective as bullets, can be sourced locally on the battlefield.

“Our men and women in uniform will now be much more self-sufficient as a result of the great insight of their Commander in Chief.”

One concern, however, is the proliferation of rocks across the globe, and the fear that they could get into the hands of rogue nations.

“North Korea already has some and our intelligence suggests Iran may be very close to getting its own rocks.”