Following the revelation that Michael Cohen has struck a plea deal, there was widespread concern in the White House today that it was about to experience disruption on a scale not even the last few weeks could have prepared it for.
“Everything that’s breakable has been put into storage.”
News that the President’s personal attorney is now co-operating with investigators has even those closest to Trump fearing for the cosmic scale of the epic tantrum that’s coming.
“Even Stephen Miller is petrified.”
Chief of Staff General John Kelly and Defense Secretary General Mattis are taking turns guarding the nuclear football in preparation for the biggest anticipated meltdown by a major world leader since Hitler was informed that things ‘weren’t all that peachy’ in Stalingrad.
“If only we were serving there instead.”
Such is the concern that Supernanny Jo Frost has been summoned to Washington from the United Kingdom. The reality star – familiar to Americans for dealing with the nations most notorious toddlers after their parents had given up – said she would try her best to manage the President’s impending unruly behavior.
“But even I can’t work miracles.”