NASA’s Spitzer Space Telescope has discovered a record-breaking seven Earth-like planets orbiting a single star, with conditions to support life somewhere between possible and probable. The discovery is huge as the planets circle the star…
(Reykjavik, Iceland) A protest movement is gathering steam in Iceland in response to President Guðni Th. Jóhannesson’s recent ban on pineapple as a pizza topping. The shocking edict was laid down abruptly by the President…
The Conservative Political Action Conference (CPAC) has dropped professional right-wing troll Milo Yiannopoulos from its program, after tapes of him saying something even they couldn’t tolerate surfaced. While CPAC was able to easily distance itself…
(Oslo, Kingdom of Norway) Having been alerted to the horrific terror attacks plaguing Sweden recently, the Norwegian government has decided it will not stand idly by and let the horrendous violence spread to its territory….
(Pyongyang, DPRK) North Korean despot Kim Jong-un gave instructions that he was not to be disturbed today as he would be busy studying videotape of President Donald Trump’s recent press conference in an effort to…
(Pittsburgh, PA) Parking downtown has been restricted today after the Mon Wharf flooded following publication of an opinion piece entitled “Dear Pittsburgh” by Pittsburgh Pirates Outfielder Andrew McCutchen. In the heart-wrenching article, McCutchen describes his…
(Chișinău, Moldova) Morale is very low in the independent Republic of Moldova these days, which is being attributed to the lack of Russian interference in the country’s affairs. Despite the being a former member of…
A local DSM-5 manual – full title of which is The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, Fifth Edition – has suffered fatal damage after catching fire during a free-wheeling press conference by President…
Education Secretary Betsy DeVos surprised critics today by announcing that her first initiative will not relate to her signature issue, school vouchers. Instead she plans to embark on an ambitious program to deregulate the sizable…
The presence of a Russian information gathering vessel off the Eastern seaboard of the United States has raised concerns, especially given the recent buzzing of US Navy ships around the world. However the Russian State…
(Havana, Cuba) The fiercely independent country of Cuba has expressed deep concerns over a neighboring country that appears to be under the influence of an autocratic foreign power on the other side of the globe….
Oklahoma State Representative Justin Humphrey has drawn the ire of many women with his belief that pregnant women are ‘hosts’ who no longer own their bodies. But perhaps no-one is better placed to teach Humphrey…
The Trump Administration has had its first personnel loss with National Security Advisor General Michael Flynn having handed in his resignation. As usual, these resignations are a cover story for a more abrupt reason for…
Valentine’s Day is a time when restaurants are full with love-struck and not so love-struck couples out for a fine meal. With this not being any ordinary day, restaurateurs says tastes are different than usual,…
A visit by Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau to the White House went horribly wrong today when a scheduled discussion on women in the workforce between him and President Trump devolved into threats of war….
Romance and high-stakes international diplomacy are proving an intoxicating mixture for the Mar-a-Lago resort in Palm Beach, Florida, whose National-Security-themed romantic getaway packages are selling like hotcakes. Their unique offering combines the traditional elements like…
Singer Adele has admitted she thought she was attending George Michael’s funeral – and not the 59th Annual Grammy Awards – when she performed a dirge-like version of the late singer’s dance club hit Fastlove…
(The White House) President Trump proved he knows how to learn from the best in his latest initiative which channels legendary President FDR. It will take the form of a series of fireside rants in…
Former Lawrenceville resident Erik Dubois has always considered himself to have a conscientious disposition from the early age. Long a full vegan, he remembers a time when he could still get food from Trader Joes….
After finally gaining access to an elementary school classroom, Education Secretary Betsy Devos invited the second graders to spell out their favorite food on the board. Aides became concerned when one student misspelled the word…
