A leading news organization defended itself today from potentially embarrassing claims that it let a typo slip by in a front page headline when it published a story entitled “Clueless Clueless Star Withdraws From Congressional…
Embattled conservative TV and radio host Laura Ingraham has seen the error of her ways and issued a heartfelt apology over her recent actions. “On reflection, in the spirit of Holy Week, I apologize for…
A survey of gun owners in the United States, which accounts for just 5% of the world population but a full half of privately owned guns, has revealed some surprising statistics about how guns are…
After convincing America she is a very credible and articulate individual capable of drawing a vivid picture in people’s minds through the power of words alone, Stormy Daniels issued a demand today for 3 billion…
The White House was put under a brief lockdown today, as a precaution following reports of a crazed raving lunatic at large on the South Lawn. Marines permanently assigned there said it was clear that…
CBS is saying it is pleased with the viewing figures it received for its 60 minutes interview of Stormy Daniels by Anderson Cooper, though a backlash may be looming after Nielsen figures reveal many were…
Following Rick Santorum’s claim that a student’s best response to classroom gun violence is to shut-up and learn CPR, the American Heart Association has revised its guidelines for high school students: STEP ONE: PREVENTION. Since…
The Parkland High School students have been receiving an impressive amount of condescension from Republicans, ranging from Marco Rubio’s antics to Florida state Rep. Elizabeth Porter’s comments that children shouldn’t be listened to about not…
Authorities are warning of an expected crime wave related to the illegal ice cream trade, after Kellyanne Conway let slip that it was more potent than heroin and other opioids. “If you’re caught selling it…
The Easter Bunny has weighed in on the pressing matter of Marlon Bundo’s sexuality, saying he can confirm that the Pence family pet is gay. “Maybe not gay exactly but definitely bi, which I can…
First Daughter Ivanka Trump can add the Thomas Dolby Award for science promotion to her long list of accomplishments following her visit to a lab earlier this week. The luminary prize is presented annually by…
Following the release of a report saying that only half of students believe the education they receive will be useful in real life, Education Secretary Betsy DeVos pledged today to improve on that figure. “I’d…
A buoyant Vladimir Putin has expressed his deep gratitude to President Trump for making a congratulatory phone call to him despite overwhelming advice not to do so. “I am touched.” Putin won the election with…
(The White House) Staff from the White House Medical Unit (WHMU) were called to the Oval Office today to check on President Trump after he went a full five minutes without saying anything even mildly…
In response to Stormy Daniels passing a lie detector test, President Trump declared that he would counter it by taking his own lie detector test to prove he was never involved with the adult actress….
The White House looks a little different today as a massive revolving door has been installed which staffers say is necessary to keep the Trump Administration running smoothly. “Sadly the iconic white pillars had to…
A Washington, DC, animal shelter that has been taking in abandoned Trump Administration officials and cabinet members has announced it is at capacity and cannot take in any more until space is freed up. “We’ve…
As she continues to seek a way out of the hush agreement constraining her, Stormy Daniels explained today that her wish to be legally allowed to discuss her involvement with President Trump is not motivated…
A Trump supporter who tweeted on Social Media that he would chop his balls off if Conor Lamb won the election for the 18th Congressional District admitted today he is struggling to carry out his…
NASA has confirmed that being in space has changed Scott Kelly’s DNA, after tests revealed differences from the DNA of his formerly identical twin, fellow astronaut Mark Kelly. For a long time NASA did not…
