Local Man Who Received Pfizer Shot Bitterly Disappointed With 5G Reception

(Sharon, PA) Local senior Marty Dixon said today he is ‘absolutely disgusted’ with the Pfizer vaccine shot he got because he was tired of his ‘crappy Verizon reception’ and was attracted by the idea of a 5G service that didn’t require a handset. The western Pennsylvania native and longtime Trump supporter said he feels like he was taken for a ride.

“I’ve been waiting for the Wendy Bell Radio show to be beamed straight into my brain but so far nothing.”

Initially he thought the poor reception was because he hadn’t waited long enough after receiving the second dose, but he says he continues to receive no signal many weeks later.

“So much for being 95% effective!”

He suspects Pfizer injected him with a faulty chip but says he is not going to waste anymore time hoping they will fix it when there is so much choice available.

“I”ve already signed up for the Moderna plan as I hear they have better coverage here anyway.”

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1 Comment on "Local Man Who Received Pfizer Shot Bitterly Disappointed With 5G Reception"

  1. John A Howell | March 28, 2021 at 12:52 pm | Reply

    I’m surprised by his poor rsults. My reception is now excellent, though tuning is poor – I have trouble controlling the voices I’m now hearing.

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