Novel Coronavirus Expresses Support For Americans’ Right To Self-Identify As Vaccinated

Speaking to George Stephanopoulos on ABC’s This Week, the novel Coronavirus said the past few months had been extremely painful, and it had almost lost faith in its ability to keep going until until the trans-vax movement took hold amongst the supporters of its favorite former President.

“We must end this terrible bigotry where you are only treated as not being a potential disease vector if you take basic precautions to avoid becoming one.”

The lipid-enveloped virus said it supports full equality rights for trans-vax people – those who are not vaccinated but instead identify as such so they can go maskless everywhere – and says they should be treated the same as cis-vax people under all circumstances.

“Who are we to say you should continue to wear a mask just because you shun the opportunity to get a free, safe, and highly effective vaccine?. If you choose to say you identify as a responsible civic minded member of society who cares about other people, it shouldn’t matter that you are actually the complete opposite of that.”

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