Peloton Unveils Motorized Stationary Bike For Those Already At Peak Hotness

After feedback that revealed a fundamental flaw in their exercise equipment, Peloton has announced a new line-up of exercise bike designed for use in the home by social-media-savvy upper-middle-class suburban moms who are already at peak hotness.

“This exercise bike burns zero calories – guaranteed!”

By using an electric motor, the bike provides it own rotation, eliminating the change that their fit toned customers might end up too sinewy or gaunt looking.

“It’s the perfect exercise bike for the people in our ads!”

This, says the company, will allow it’s customers who are already perfect to post videos about exercising without doing any.

1 Comment on "Peloton Unveils Motorized Stationary Bike For Those Already At Peak Hotness"

  1. Annette Cunningham | September 11, 2020 at 11:43 am | Reply

    I have been interested in a motorized bike, especially for handicapped people. Would have to have larger, safer seat and peddles holding feet in place. Etc

Leave a comment

Your email address will not be published.